It is almost Valentine’s day, and one of my absolute favourite things to do is tending to the people I care about most. Making sure I have a solid self-care base is the only way that I can maintain my health, my love for life, my business and my sanity. I know, that when I am low on giving myself some TLC, the world feels a bit too much.
The usual story of over-committing, not enough rest, scarce mental downtime and keeping my eye on the goal of being my best as a therapist, a star rated mom, wife, friend….
And before long, I lie flat on my face, a birthday forgotten, an email inbox chockfull, worst of all feeling ragged..mostly to myself and all my true desires.
Can you find some truth in this, dear friend?
Then the guilt kicks in…but we stil deny ourselves the tools and time necessary to actually meet our desired goals. We try to treat everyone around us like the wonderful beings they are (yet when we run low on TLC, we do tend to struggle a bit with this), but when it comes to ourselves, we judge, blame and end up in a downward spiral.
The good news is, the RECIPE FOR SELF-CARE success, is uncomplicated.
For me it is a healthy serving of fresh air, a good sweat, delicious food, enough sleep, and practising being aware of my breathing.
Because we have so much on our plates, the kids, health struggles, friends, the grocery list, you name it, it is so important to carve out sacred, non-negotiable self-care time.
FIND SOMETHING THAT WORKS FOR YOU.
Perhaps it is only 10 minutes a day, that is truly yours.
Perhaps it is noticing the beauty in a special area of your neighbourhood.
Perhaps it is the caring tone you speak to yourself, Good Morning, dear Ammarentia, I love you, today is going to be just wonderful, because I choose to make it so.
What does self-care mean for you?
For me it is really the simple things….
Being a kind friend to myself.
Listening to what I truly need.
Tending to my own hurts with honor.
Creating boundaries so that I do not get exhausted.
Fuelling my body, instead of depleting her.
Practising the art of respecting, caring for and loving all parts of me.
All parts, the scars, the lumps, the bumps and veins.
Nourishing my body with good food.
Accepting help from others.
Releasing anger, resentment and judgement.
What self-care is not for me:
Saying yes to obligations I dread.
Spending time with people who drain me.
Having a harsher set of standards for myself than I have for others.
Forcing myself to exercise.
Helping and serving others, more than I serve myself.
Self care is not selfish, it is what our soul needs. Self-care is loving and it is kindness, there is even a beautiful spiritual element to acknowledging our own worth.